Someone asked the other day about my blog.. and honestly, I hadn't thought about it for a while. But I'm glad I have inspiration again. So let's dive right in.
I want to formally apologize to anyone I met between the years of 2018-2021... cause baby I didn't know what the heck was going on with me, God, my career, my relationships, all of it. I was quite frankly.... unbalanced. So much was happening and not happening at the same time. I even fell into a depression for about 15 months of it. I had a close friend of mine asked me one day "Jas, do you think you might be depressed?" And I said, "maybe." Honey, I was! I cried EVERY DAY for about 4 months and couldn't even tell you why! Just crying!
But God... I do have in my strength back. I'm making decisions again that benefit me and push me towards my purpose; this mess is scary. Mostly because I know people thought I was crazy there for a while. Some probably still do... oh well. I've never felt more sure of myself and my call and purpose in my life. Now am I fully working towards these things? No, I would probably give myself a 88% in that area (that's the teacher in me). But I'm building my trust in myself and my abilities back.
I now know the point of those 4ish years was to remind me of who God was and that he is my supplier and not me. That he has the plan for my life and I need to throw away everything I ever thought my life was supposed to look like and follow his plan.
It's so interesting how people say I've changed but honestly, I think I've become a better version of the person I was before I became unbalanced. I joked with my friends that I reinvent myself like the iPhone. I'm probably on version Jasmine 4.0 and I like her. There are still a few kinks I need to work out (me and God got some faith stuff going on). But, overall I am thankful that God never leaves me nor forsakes me. That he gives grace for me to learn, experiment, and figure it out. I'm excited about what the last quarter of 2022 will bring.
God is good y'all... even in the unbalance.