Sooooo in December 2017, I was supposed to fast to pray for the new year. It wasn’t an extreme fast, doable on all accounts. I say that to say I could have done it, but didn’t. I do this so much when it comes to fasting. Praying, I got it; singing super duper loud during worship, I got it; leading/starting ministries, I got that too. (Of course with the help of God for all you super spiritual people out there.) But fasting, not so much. I honestly think I’ve only completed one fast in my entire life. The whole 27 almost 28 years of my life. If the fast lasted more than one day, I’m not doing it.
So I’m a quitter. And today, as I quitted yet another fast, I sit and wonder… how does this affect my life? Why do I keep quitting? It’s not because I’m incapable. It’s not because I’m hungry and thought I was going to die. So what is it? Why do I sabotage each fast God or I set before me?
I’m still waiting on the answer to those questions, but I will say I’ve learned two key things in quitting fasts.
1) God doesn’t quit on me. Today as I broke my fast, I knew God wanted me to begin again tomorrow. This does not mean he’s not upset that I broke the fast. But even in being upset with people we love we still want the best for them. This is where I am with God.
2) Quitting only hurts me. I think about this when I’m in the gym. My quitting or cheating doesn’t hurt my trainer. It hurts me. I don’t get stronger or faster. His strength stays the same. It’s the same with fasting my endurance doesn’t get better. I don’t go to a new place spiritually. God does and forever will, stay the same.
I want to remember this as I attempt to complete fast number 5 since the beginning of the new year (don’t judge me, even though I know you already are lol). God will never quit on me!
The Lord will not reject his people; he will not abandon his special possession. Ps. 94:14
Pray for ya girl. I have to get this fasting thing down!
God is good y’all, even when I cheat.