I didn’t look…
Here we go again… Yet another unarmed black man being shot down in cold blood for being black. Wait…. and now another one.. and this one was laughed at, so I heard. And I have a confession… I didn’t look at either video. I could not watch them. My response is always to shut down. I’ve known this for quite some time but for some reason, it feels different now.
Do you remember when that white supremacist went into Emanuel African Methodist Episcopal Church and murdered 9 innocent people? I was in graduate school at the time and 2 of my non-black friends were concerned about me and asked if I was okay. I told them I didn’t know the details and didn’t really have an answer. They were shocked. I don’t need to know much more than someone white killed someone black for sport. But it’s how I cope with the injustices against black bodies in this world. I look away. The pain is too deep.
Earlier this week, I had a conversation with a friend from college about race and COVID -19. We discussed how states are choosing to open (what types of businesses) and if it is racial in nature. I responded: …I always think America will be bent toward inequality. We were founded by people who thought it was okay to buy other people, it literally runs through our blood.
Today, I see Facebook pages in support of two men who wanted another man to listen to their commands solely because they are white. “Christians” are supporting these men. Then we wonder why no one wants to follow Jesus….
Today, I read a stat that says black people make up about 8-15% of professionals in Atlanta. Atlanta is 54% black. How does this make sense?
Today, I see questions like, “What are my white friends teaching their children not to kill my children?” I know, I know not all white people are the problem. This is a great question. What are you doing?
Today, I saw a black man caption “Black women could never.” on top of a picture of 4 white women. I literally said, “God, I’m tired.” It feels like there is never space to just be. I must be something or compete with someone.
God, I’m tired.
America needs to stop looking to its past for a marker of right and wrong. We need to rewrite a future that sees black people as people.
God is good.